Doctor Who - The Tom Farmer Years: New Cows!

[Rob McCow]

MOOREN LEANED FORWARD AND GAZED INTO THE MILK BOTTLE. 'NOW IS THE MOMENT, SISTER. THE MILK MAN SLEEPS, HE CANNOT PROTECT HIMSELF AGAINST US...'
On the bleak and lonely planet of Kown, the moo-sterious Sisterhoof guards the Sacred Cow, from which the Rough-Tongue-Licks-You of Life comes. But the Cow is dying...
Elsewhere on the planet, the renegade Milk Lord MOOBIUS awaits the creation of a moo-nstrous new full-bodied cheese which will give him the power to rule the Galaxy Milk Chocolate Factory.

[Stuart Wallis]

Love the snout on the Krowl! And the Pantomime Udder.

Should have seen Moobius coming!

[Jonno]

We can all see Moobius coming with that brain! Looks worse than last year's Cyber-Controller!

[Dave Tudor]

Great 'Moobius' cover, but where oh where is Dr. Moohendri Sirloin...?

[Rob McCow]

Sirloin! Jeez, I must have spent minutes sitting there trying to think of a Solon pun.

I'm losing it

[Stuart Wallis]

Losing it? Never! just beef up your ideas, young man.

[RetroRobot]

Dear Rob

(whoops! - see next...)

[RetroRobot]

Dear Rob

In response to your Moonificent Cowmpatssion for Rural Who* and in recognition of your Bovine Fixation here is a link to a set of ASCII cartoons: 'The Complete Guide to Cows' (which even has a Who-joke and a CowDalek in it so we're still On Top IC!)

http://smohith.tripod.com/htdocs/fan...side/cows.html

[* "and did that TARDIS, in all those Times, landing in England's pastures green, not even once, as it would seem, end up amongst a cowpat's steam?" ]

Thanks for the milky goodness

MetroMoobot
("RetroRobots Low & Behold!")

[Rob McCow]

Cowdaleks are always a treat. If only Dalek Sec had decided that cow DNA was what the Daleks needed to survive!

[SiHart]

I thoight he did... that'd certainly explain the appearance of his new udders...

Si xx

[RetroRobot]

Oh yes, i can see it now...

a placid herd of cowmen ("women, c?") receiving instructions from Dalek Sic('em) [of the 'Cowgo Cult of Skarmoo'] all the whilst sedately chewing gum with that concentrated look of pure evil cunning that cows have:

"Right, we go and capture these People, yeah? - like We round Them up you mean? And then we give them some milk. No? We, erm, Herd this, um, what's the Collective for humans Mooriel? - this, ah, Crowd of prisoners down here into this, well, i must say, Pigsty (i mean it's not exactly Pastoral down here is it Mahaagaret?) and Then we give 'em a nice feed of milk. No?"
[oh, look - roast beef!]

Or there'd be these musclebound Minotaurs roaring about in a red-faced rage, getting their enormous black horns caught up in the plumbing and challenging the Doctor pinned against the corridor: "Don't You Know Me, Doctor!?*"

"Who? - sorry...Have we met? Or are you just Winding Up the Timelord's Watch, eh, so to speak - WellllllYou-mightn't o'course, more likely it'd be Me! So there y'go - well I go anyway. Um, Sorrry, er, Who are you exactly? Oh, COWmen! - well, cowBoys in fact, i mean it's obvious really and then there's those silly cows huddled over there behind their pulchritude and good heavens! - that's not a milk-churn, iiit'sa Daaalekkk!!! Ohhhh, innit Cute! I thought we'd gone out of stock with them?!? Typical, one moment y'think y've collected the lot and next thing you find y'self Bargaining in a Basement with them. Excuse me, but why has one of those Bulls got tentacles? He's Not a Cowbrid? - he's a ManKaled!! ("MankyLad" more like!) Gosh, that's wizard!!! - evil - but dead clever, Live clever even, if you call that "living" ...being half human."

[* Think 'Legend' - Ridley Scott's a legit Who-reference, yes? ("my foot!") ]

Oh you're sorry now, aren't you?
That'll teach you to have Little Yellow Truck with the RetroRobot!

"RetroRobots Conquer and Enjoy!"

[Ssarl]

Time to set a record for resurrecting the most long-dead thread!

I've just done a massive hard drive cleanup and one thing that turned up was an unspeakably ancient folder of silly old photoshops of Doctor Who. The cow covers up to The Wheel in Space were lovingly archived there, for my young self had found them unmatched in hilarity.

I see the links to the Tom pictures is still live; I was wondering if there are more still in existence from the first three Doctors? I'd love to see them for nostalgia's sake.

[Stuart Wallis]

Ah! the thread that suddenly stopped! Memories...