Building a clone army

[WhiteCrowNZ]

Yeah we have the Star Wars franchise to thank slightly for that - building a clone army based on Temuera Morrison.

But when the words "Clone Wars" were used in 1977 original Star Wars, no-one could imagine how big today the issue of "human cloning" would become.

All very high brow, but in science fiction, people are obsessed with building clones of Temuera or for God's sake Adolf Hitler. They're very obsessed with making clones of Adolf Hitler. Personally I think they already have cloned him, and sent this clone army to work as traffic wardens (shudders).

Anyway, simple as. Who would you base a clone army one?

[shada pavlova]

I remember there was a kid at my school called Dean, who was obsessed with making a huge clone army of himself to dominate the world. For a while, I went along with it (mainly because if I didn't he'd thump me) until he started actually bringing in to school what he said were "embryonic clones" of himself. Upon closer inspection, they were in fact those little Sea Monkey things.

Funnily enough, I never saw him much after that...

I think Pip knows who I'd base a clone army on...

[Rob McCow]

A dribbling clone army?

The thought occurs that when any battle looks like being lost and all hope is gone, the only thing that could be guaranteed to save the day would be an army of 100,000 Brian Blesseds on horseback. That'd sort it out.

[WhiteCrowNZ]

For me would have to be someone kick-ass but probably also someone sexy-fem as well. A Clone Army of the She-Devil would probably terrify the galaxy for all the wrong reasons.

A clone army of Buffys would kick ass - but omg the whining. And the whole en mass teenage pining for an undead vampire lover would be a bit too Twilight for comfort.

[Anthony Williams]

Chuck Norris.

Ant x

[MinaHarker]

Dog the Bounty Hunter.

[Rob McCow]

William Hartnell.

[Stuart Wallis]

Prepare for the clones of Ebenezer Wallis, who are about to embark on queue jumping, letting down tyres, persuading the postal workers to go on striking, yelling "Humbug!" at innapropriate times and generally causing misery until BBC Wales hands over Karen Gillan.

Of course they could always clone Karen Gillan and hand it over at the appropriate age. By which time Ebenezer Wallis will be to old to remember what he wanted it for...

[WhiteCrowNZ]

Hmmm - after several days of deliberation (I know I take such things too seriously), I have decided I would base my clone army on Battleaxe from Gladiators, thereby ticking several boxes ...

[Jason Thompson]

My clone army would be based on the entire Mythbusters team. I'd turn them loose and then the Adams, Torys, Grants and Karis would go in and destroy the enemy's equipment in spectaculkar ways while the Jamies work on developing an ultimate weapon that will bring victory in one blow. If you think an army of Jamie Hynemans couldn't win any war you've never watched the show!

[WhiteCrowNZ]

My clone army would be based on the entire Mythbusters team. I'd turn them loose and then the Adams, Torys, Grants and Karis would go in and destroy the enemy's equipment in spectaculkar ways while the Jamies work on developing an ultimate weapon that will bring victory in one blow. If you think an army of Jamie Hynemans couldn't win any war you've never watched the show!

Thats a disturbinly cunning plan for world domination there!

[Jon Masters]

A clone army is a big mistake - one cunningly fashioned retrovirus designed to attack that individual's DNA would wipe the whole lot out in one go.

So I'd go for a clone army of giant trypanosomes (protozoa that cause sleeping sickness) as they cunningly change their structure on a regular basis.

Either that, or Constable Odo

[Jason Thompson]

A clone army is a big mistake - one cunningly fashioned retrovirus designed to attack that individual's DNA would wipe the whole lot out in one go.

Assuming you base your entire army on one individual, which you'll notice I did not.

That's the same point I've made whenever people ask why the Sontarans are not all identical when they're supposed to be clones. No-one ever said they were all cloned from the same individual's DNA.

[Jon Masters]

Assuming you base your entire army on one individual, which you'll notice I did not.

I did indeed. Some people are cut out for world domination, others are not

[shada pavlova]

Assuming you base your entire army on one individual, which you'll notice I did not.

That's the same point I've made whenever people ask why the Sontarans are not all identical when they're supposed to be clones. No-one ever said they were all cloned from the same individual's DNA.

You know what? I haven't done this for a long time, so I'm going to take the bait on this one.

In The Infinity Doctors it is revealed that all modern Sontarans are "descended" (or clone equivalent - you know what I mean) from the greatest Sontaran warrior there ever was, the aptly-named General Sontar.

Ooh, that felt good. Your move, Jason.

[Jason Thompson]

1: The Infinity Doctors is part of an extensive range of books, the canonicity of which is debated hotly to this day, and which I don't count.

2: The Infinity Doctors was more a 'what if' than part of the ongoing series of adventures, even within the book series, so anything contained therein should not be taken as part of the canon anyway.

3: The author probably had the same incorrect leap between 'clone army' and 'all cloned from the same person'.

4: Whatever the books may say, the Sontarans on screen clearly are NOT identical and all the same pattern.

[WhiteCrowNZ]

In The Infinity Doctors it is revealed that all modern Sontarans are "descended" (or clone equivalent - you know what I mean) from the greatest Sontaran warrior there ever was, the aptly-named General Sontar.

I think I remember reading much the same in the Dr Who role playing game notes. Again not cannon though.

[Jon Masters]

The equally non-canon book Lords of the Storm has the Doctor explain that not only do different Sontaran clans use different gene pools, but that the clones of common soldiers are missing certain genes that the commanders have to stop them being too intelligent.

[Rob McCow]

Even with cloning, I'm sure that the conditions of upbringing, nutrition, and experiences could make radically different individuals.

[Andrew Curnow]

It always makes me smile, because 'they are a clone race' sounds like typically-ingenious Bob Holmes thinking to allow the BBC to reuse the same mask again and again - ie, do it on the cheap! So it's ironic that every single Sontaran story has had a brand new mask made!!

[shada pavlova]

The Infinity Doctors was more a 'what if' than part of the ongoing series of adventures, even within the book series

Not necessarily. It might take place on the post-Gallifrey Chronicles but pre-Time War Gallifrey, or before the First Doctor's departure.

so anything contained therein should not be taken as part of the canon anyway.

Oh, so Omega never ended up stuck in a black hole, then?

And the Sontarans and the Rutans were never at war?

Oh, and there's no such thing as Temporal Grace?

(Oh...um...er...actually, I'll give you that last one. )

Whatever the books may say, the Sontarans on screen clearly are NOT identical and all the same pattern.

Well, who's to say that the design on-screen is EXACTLY like what the Sontarans looked like in real(ish) life? Take the Cybermen for instance. They are never seen to have time-travel capability (well, not without nicking it from somebody else) and yet they only seem to evolve according to their order of televised appearances, NOT according to their own timeline. Therefore, it could be argued that the BBC are not offering a window onto the reality of the Doctor Who universe, but merely a representation of it, using the best resources and materials that they have at the time. Therefore, it's not impossible that the Sontarans do in fact all look exactly the same (human characters have often pointed this out), but the BBC just can't accurately portray them as such.

Blimey, this is fun.

[Stuart Wallis]

The Infinity Doctors was more a 'what if' than part of the ongoing series of adventures, even within the book series, so anything contained therein should not be taken as part of the canon anyway.

Sorry Harry, but it was advertised as such at the time it was published. The idea was "What if the Doctor hadn't left Gallifrey?" Omega and the Sontaran/Rutan war were used as pegs for hanging the plot on; what we were given were this parallel universe's versions of The Three Doctors and The Invasion Of Time.

[shada pavlova]

So you're taking the contemporary publicity as canon but not the book itself?

[SiHart]

This from the person who claims the BBC aren't accuaretly portraying events on screen!

Si xx

[shada pavlova]

Yes, but with a book, with words, your own imagination shapes the events. Therefore, it is perfectly within the ability of any competent writer to describe accurately (and with appropriate regard to established continuity) any events chronicled therein.