Valentines Day gifting ...

[WhiteCrowNZ]

A friend of mine has a very upset 5 year old. Her daughter was under the impression Valentines Day was another day like Christmas or Birthday, where you get presents. And woke up bitterly disapointed. Then again maybe it's useful life skills for when she's 15 and doesn't get a card and wonders if no-one loves her.

Yeah Valentines, the season of insecurity is upon us! If you're single, you wonder if someone is going to make you aware of their feelings for you. Or maybe you can tell someone you fancy. But let's be honest in the modern age, getting an anonymous card in the mail feels more like a stalker message of "I know where you live".

For those of us in relationships, the question is "how far do you push the boat out". For me it's typically in the bracket of maybe a CD or a box of chocolates. Or maybe both if the CD is on offer (who says the age of romance is dead). And maybe a meal, not on Valentines day (cos the prices usually skyrocket) but the week before/after.

However ads over here have been suggesting more in the region of a "top of the line mobile phone" to tell her how you feel. WTF??? Are they real? Or maybe people are big spenders, and I'm just Mr Thrifty/tight (delete as appropriate).

There's been a major uproar by florists here this year - a major outlet is now stocking roses for Valentines for $20 for a dozen. Typically florists charge closer to $100, but were on TV saying they don't make any money from the skyrocketed prices, as they had to put on extra staff to process the mass of orders.

Anyway - what's your opinion of Valentines Day gifting?

[Si Hunt]

Typically florists charge closer to $100, but were on TV saying they don't make any money from the skyrocketed prices, as they had to put on extra staff to process the mass of orders.

There's something very weird about that. If you're losing money because you're paying extra staff to cater for a large number of orders, you ought to examine either your price or your wages! Because something isn't adding up there!

Si.

[WhiteCrowNZ]

I'm not buying that one either Si. You can't help but feel cynically it's just becoming an excuse to tide retailers over between Christmas and Easter ...

[Captain Tancredi]

It's not something that bothers me one way or the other- not unlike the way St Patrick's Day leaves me cold because I don't have any Irish connections. I did notice a lot of tat in Sainsbury's earlier- a lot of CDs by old crooners and romantic ballads- and they were doing a £10 deal including a bottle of wine and a two-course meal, but I just don't see it as relevant to me any more. I've reached the conclusion that although I have a fair bit to offer, I'm probably not what most women think they're looking for, and no amount of shop-bought frippery is going to change what I have to work against.

[WhiteCrowNZ]

I'm probably not what most women think they're looking for

Yeah - I used to think that (about myself). But you don't need most women, you just need one. But I think if you're single, Valentines day isn't going to be the relationship breakthrough it's tauted as - unless you pick up someone who is just desparate not to be single on Valentines day. Is desparation a good start to a relationship? I don't think so.

I just seem to be attracted to women who are different, although invariably that turns out to mean "weird" and occasionally "disturbed".

[Andrew Curnow]

I'm afraid that I don't do Valentine's day. We sort of used to up until, I don't know, maybe three or four years ago, but it just somehow seemed kind of pointless. So now Zel knows I definitely will not be doing anything and she does the same! That said, she does usually moan about it to anybody who'll listen, but nevertheless I think it's one small victory for sanity.

And I can quite understand your friend's little girl getting confused, Mike. When our littl'un was younger she seemed to think Halloween was a Big Deal for everyone, simply because of the bombardment of it in all shop windows. And what really niggles me about these things is that it gets more and more each year - in twenty years time Valentines Day will probably be huge, bringing with it absurd expectations and probably causing more rows than it does new relationships!

[Jason Thompson]

What bugs me is that every advert on telly adds 'the perfect gift for Valentine's Day' to almost everything. Weirdly, they even added it to the ad for the new Peter Andre album, and the voiceover proclaiming it the perfect Valentine's Day gift played over a clip of Andre singing 'she's out of my life'!

[Si Hunt]

I'm actually pro-Valentines Day. Those who say "it's a marketing thing"... well, so is Christmas but we all celebrate that in our own way. You don't have to spend loads of money to celebrate Valentines Day - and it's a good excuse to show your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife that you care about them if the hustle and bustle of modern life means you don't seem to find the time otherwise. I also think that, like it or not, as a country we do HAVE a Valentines Day so it's perhaps not your own principles that you should consider but those of your partner - if they hate it too, then fine, but you don't want them to feel left out.

You don't have to spend a lot, even just cooking a meal, or some flowers, or just doing something you wouldn't normally do.

Si.

[Llordllama]

Sorry, you mean I shouldn't have stomped around the house when the Wife didn't buy me another 10 daleks like I asked for in my letter to the Valentines' Goose? Damn.

[Darren]

Like any holiday or celebration, it doesn't take long for it to be cynically and commercialy exploited. I'm not sure why people are only able to be romantic on one day of the year. Love is forever not just for Valentines. But as Si says, do it your way.
I bought a pair of gold and silver earrings and ordered a bouquet of flowers for my special someone who I've been friends with for ages.
I don't think I'm single anymore. and possibly

[WhiteCrowNZ]

Wow - so Valentines Day alchemy works???

I usually thought it was kind of reverse-alchemy, turning your gold into lead.

[SiHart]

for Darren! That's wonderful news.

Si xx

[Dave Tudor]

Ah, so that's why Darren hasn't been around so much lately... Really pleased for you!

[Darren]

It'll be a gradual thing. Thing is we are already friends, but there is still a lot to find out about each other.

[SiHart]

That's the fun bit, isn't it?

Si xx

[Darren]

Oh yes.

Memorising her family will be hard. It's huuugggge.

[shada pavlova]

Some wise(ish) words: When in doubt, whip it out!

[Si Hunt]

Oh my!

Si. :mobile

[Philipnet]

Oh my!

Hang on - wrong Si!